Feeling Selfish

I wake up every morning at 5:00am. I shower, iron, walk the dog and hit the road no later than 6:00am. I'm at my desk in Boston around 6:30 - 7:00am and it's non-stop from that point until about 6:00pm. I'm usually back home between 6:30 - 7:00pm.

For me, finding time to pray isn't easy. I don't have much discipline, and normally sneak my prayer time in when I have free time. For example: driving to the office in Boston or to the T Station in Quincy.

I find myself praying throughout the day, but I am never setting that "appointment" with God. Why is it that I am never late for work, can manage staff while attending meetings, but can not find the 1:1 time with God that I want?

Mark 1:35 says "The next morning Jesus awoke long before daybreak and went out alone into the wilderness to pray".

I'm not saying I need to wake up at 4:30am now, but maybe I should. If I know that prayer is the key that unlocks the faith in my life, why am I not setting aside quality time to invite God to fill me with faith and power?

Matthew 6:7 says "When you pray, don't babble on and on...only by repeating your words again and again".

OK, so while I am making scattered time to pray I am definitely being repetitive in my prayers. And on top of being repetitive, I feel like I am being selfish because I am always asking for something. I'm not giving anything, or asking God "what can I do for you?", it's always a prayer asking for a desired result.

Matthew 6:9-13 is the Lord's prayer. It teaches us how to pray. It isn't a "me" prayer by any means, it starts by praising God's name. It's a prayer that asks that God's perfect purpose will be accomplished in this world. It's a prayer that identifies God as a provider for our needs.

Here's my question: If we are not praying in the formation of the Lord's Prayer, which is specifically identified as "how we should pray", will God discount out prayers? I realize that there are times where we need to pray for something for OURSELVES. But if we are not praising God's name and continue to ask for things we want and are not disciplined enough to give God our undivided attention, why would He WANT to listen and answer my prayers like he would for someone else who is dedicated to spending undivided time with God and prays as we are taught to pray?

I know God answers all prayers, and by no means am I trying to validate my prayer time and prayer "outline", but I feel selfish and realize I need to pray differently.

The Green Flag

Welcome!

So here it is – my long anticipated “blog”. To be honest, up until a few months ago, I didn’t even know what a blog was. I remember in the Presidential debates that there was mention of “John Kerry’s Blog”. I figured it was another word for a commercial, or some sort of advertisement. Not being a fan of Mr. Kerry’s, I never looked into it. So then I’m sitting in church a few months ago and there’s mention of the church’s blog. I thought, “why are we running ads on tv?”. Of course I was then distracted for the remainder of the service thinking of Pastor Tom on television asking people to “Come on down!”. Just what we need, another Ernie Boch.

So that’s how I got here. Church. I’m hoping I can spend a lot of time providing new posts (or blogs, if that’s what they call it) to inspire additional discussions and conversations. I normally have a lot to say, so my problem may be that I write too much and people don’t have time to keep up. And, although I am not a shallow man, I don't know how deep I can go here...but we'll see. One thing is for certain, racing will always get some sort of support in my commentary!

The question I keep asking myself: Will my wonderful wife, Jen, accept a response of “sorry, hunny, I can’t do the dishes tonight because I’m working on church stuff” as an excuse?

More to come soon!